I remember a dream I had years ago, when I was only 9 or 10. I was in a little wooden boat, just drifting on calm waters in an ocean where the water was a beautiful emerald green. The sun was golden and warm, and as I drifted further along I came upon a few large rocks. Although greyish brown, the rocks warmed to a golden color and became a brownish red as the sun shone on them. There was nothing but a vibrant blue sky, a touch of white wispy clouds, placid waters, the little brown boat and me. I don't remember how it happened, but suddenly I was underwater, sinking deeper in the ocean and watching the silhouette of the little boat grow darker and further away from me. I wasn't struggling, rather I was very calm, just sinking pleasantly into the water, which washed over me like a thick, warm blanket. I sank deeper and deeper into those soft warm waters and the last thing I remember seeing before waking up was that silhouette of the boat and the rays of the golden sun against the water's surface.

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Lately I've been feeling like I'm floating underwater. Actually, I've been feeling like that for a while now. Things are muffled; I'm just drifting along with the daily routine. It's been frustrating because although lots of positive and happy things are happening around me, the only things that can jerk me out of the water are negative. I have no problem letting anger and negativity boil inside of me, spilling over as I vent and cry tears of frustration and rage. But when it comes to being happy and recognizing the good things in life that are unfolding around me, I'm back in the water, deep in the depths.